Consider these keys to help you manage whining.
By: Cintia Saporito
Even if you already speak with ease, to some crying children, the first response to any situation is tiny whining. As much as we try to satisfy them, they always seem to find reasons to turn to tears. Do you feel that your patience has become exhausted? It is time to help them to overcome the permanent ‘whining’.
Why is your child whining?
Your attention is a powerful tool, and your children will turn to what works to get what they want. That is, it is a tactic, said Dr. Tanya Gesek, a child psychologist.
However, if the whining persists, it could lead them to be teenagers who use drama as a way to achieve their goals, both in their relationships and in life. So find out what you can do as a mom to help control it.
What can you do?
The goal is to make sure, when they are small, that whining does not work, emphasizes Gesek. To do this, consider these keys:
Ignore it. Your attention will act as a reinforcement of behavior. So if you continue the conversation when you hear whining, you will only motivate them to continue. It is better to say, “It seems that someone wants something, but with so much crying, I cannot understand it.”
Do not give in. If they are whining in the street or at the store because they want, for example, candy, is important to stay firm, even if you feel embarrassed. If you give in, they get the message that tears get the reward, explained Dr. Jill Creighton, a pediatrician at Children’s Hospital Stony Brook. Another proposal:
Let them express their feelings without indulging them. It is important that they deal with emotions like anger, sadness or frustration, even if it makes them whine. Validate their feelings, without yielding. Try phrases like this: ” I know you’re angry, but when you’re ready to talk, I’ll be in the kitchen.”
Establish a routine. Whining increases when children are exhausted or hungry. Make sure your children get enough sleep, have regular mealtimes and drink plenty of water.
Limit ‘screen time.’ Although screens may keep them happy, in excess they ould overstimulate children, making them irritable.
Encourage them to communicate. You can say: ” I do not understand when you talk like that, can you talk like a big boy? “
Choose your battles wisely. If you are too rigid and have too much control over all aspects, he may ultimately break out over something small and lose control, says Dr. Gail Gross, an expert in family and child development.
Change of environment before the drama. If your child is about to start crying, create a distraction or go elsewhere, added the specialist.
Use humor. Show them how it sounds, so they can laugh about it and not want to hear it. Make sure, however, not to do so with anger, or make them feel like you are making fun of them, ended Antoinette Kuritz , educator and founder of the conference for writers , La Jolla.
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